Demon Days

So here it is the summertime and it's in full swing. Germany has been getting a rash of hot weather all this past week or so and people are dropping like flies practically. Myself, I wake up at the butt-crack of noon and play video games until midnight. If I'm so inclined I go out to eat or to get out of the house for a bit. It's nice not having to worry about anything for the next month or so.

One good thing about the hot weather is that all the hotties are out in their summer clothes and horny bastards like myself enjoy getting a free show checking out their skimpy outfits. On the flip side they have fat beasts out wearing their summer tents too which is why I quickly avert my eyes when one of these hippos in size a size 26 parachute comes trolling out with her two screaming brats.

I went to the lake nearby the other day too in hopes of seeing some topless chicks since the Germans are into that kinda thing. Not a one. Instead I saw some old dude change his Speedo in public, exposing his bare naked flabby ass to the world for all to see - both young and old alike. I was mortified - my eyes became petrified and I had to use Medusa brand eye drops to get rid of the image. Good thing he didn't turn around either, lest his fruit basket be witnessed and then I have to scrub my brain out with toxic chemicals. I swear it's like a bad Benny Hill comedy skit.

I need to get laid. Need to find some hottie that will let me give her the Shocker too since everyone I know talks about it but nobody has ever admitted to doing it or having it done to themselves. I think the thing is an urban legend, kinda like those chain letters you get that say if you don't forward the e-mail then some maniac will break out of prison and will come teabag you in your sleep. I could be the first to prove that the Shocker does indeed exist, and that chicks dig it. Come to think of it, I'm secretly convinced that alot of chicks like anal sex too, only they're afraid that if they admit it, that they'll be treated like some gang-bang sex puppet by their boyfriends. I know I'm not imagining this shit, nor am I making it up either.

So hopefully these demon days will be enjoyed - perhaps I should go to Amsterdam or Switzerland for shits n' grins. Might as well while I can.