Kunsan: 2001 and Now

I returned to Kunsan after leaving Andrews AFB in January of 2001. I knew that if I was going to survive career-wise in the military, it would have to be some place that wasn't so highly political, and Andrews AFB was by far the most political military base, next to Bolling AFB and the Pentagon (literally as well as figuratively). I had just gotten into trouble with some cry-baby Christian in my office for saying "Jesus Fucking Christ" after he more or less beat it out of me, and figured the entire office was out to kill me since I had finally revealed I was a practicing Satanist the entire time.

Fuck this bullshit. I need out. And fast!

But where can I go?

Ah! I know! KUNSAN!!!!

Surely Kunsan, being the Den of Iniquity and home of drunken debauchery will gladly welcome me back in her loving arms once more and all will be right with my world, right?

WRONG.

Something or someone had put a halt to the majority of the fun that was going on here and for what specific reason, I couldn't begin to imagine. People were still having sex, only it was toned down somewhat. People were still going out drinking, only Town Patrol became a bunch of assholes. They were starting to enforce curfew more heavily, as well as the idea of having a "wingman" to go out and babysit you. People used to have the option to live off-base although that had been rescinded too for "Force Protection" purposes.

For what?

North Korea, the only threat to the South was chilling out at the time and they weren't acting like these fucking asshole terrorists we see on the nightly news. The North Koreans don't resort to suicide bombings or any of that shit. Instead they just want to know what our capabilities are and get that information through their sleeper agents they put on our bases. Like the bullshit elevated terror alerts that followed after the September 11th attacks, our leadership just wanted to control us by keeping tabs on where we were at all times. The phrase "Shut up and color" became common when either myself or someone else would openly challenge these bullshit rules that were being made.

It didn't end there - soon everthing you did came under scrutinization because the Total Person Concept had just been born. Basically anything you do on and off duty will can and will be used against you if seen appropriate. After all, you're an ambassador of good will when you're overseas, supposively. The truth is that Air Force senior leadership have become a bunch of third-rate politicians and want us little guys to follow their lead - total PR bullshit. You're expected to wear khakis or Docker pants with matching collared shirt and low quarters when not in uniform, or look like some hillbilly NASCAR driver wanna-be. My Lounge wear from Hot Topic became a matter of issue as well since it was deemed inappropriate by the asshole First Sargeant I had at the time. Granted there was nothing obscene like a naked woman or anything inappropriate written like Will Fuck on the First Date on my shirts, but just flames, devils, dragons or skulls. Still, this was the mentality that was being formed and has remained to this day. At first I challenged it but the more I pushed the issue, the more senior leadership pushed back in return. And harder too.

It didn't end there either. The same assholes that were giving me grief about my clothes also gave grief about other things as well. The music I listened to, the pictures I had on my desk at work as well as my overall job performance. Mind you, I wasn't doing anything deliberate yet they took it upon themselves to stick their noses in my business. The pictures I got grief about? Here's an example:




I was told to take this down because it looked like the little bullet guy was giving you the finger. That's stretching it a bit, but I did what was asked and I still got written up for it anways. What fucking assholes. It seemed like I was better off at Andrews in the long run since these fuckers were pushing hard to get me kicked out of the military. And for what? Just because I looked different and didn't want to play their bullshit reindeer games? Fuck that!

I vowed to myself that if this is the taste of things to come then I will never return to Korea again, so long as I live. I'll just go to Japan like I've been wanting to all this time and set root down so I can move on with my life.

Well, I spoke too soon. Like a dumb-ass I forgot to remove Kunsan from my Dream Sheet after I arrived to Misawa. The LAST thing I thought that would happen would be the fact I would get picked up again to return here. Boy was I wrong.

When I found out I had orders to return here last year, I just about broke down and had a conniption in my commander's office. After all, I had suffered a year of tyranny and bullshit and had witnessed a dark side of the Air Force that no squadron commander, First Shirt, or senior NCO would admit to or take responsibility for, and had orders to return back to this hell-hole of of a nightmare. The fun, easy-going college campus mentality that flourished 10 years ago quickly became a prison camp gulag theme park instead.

It's not uncommon now for people to be restricted to base for whatever reason - primarily due to training exercises or protestors outside the front gate. Now, you MUST have a wingman anytime after 9pm and you MUST be back on base before 1 AM or else you're likely to get a stripe yanked. Living off-base is heavily scrutinized and we're constantly having sexual assault briefings shoved down our throats despite the fact we've had an all time low trend. The base commander cleared A-Town of Juicee Girls and is working hard on closing down the hooches since one or two people have complained how they don't like seeing alcohol served there. One or two people!

I almost got ugly with the people that manage everyone there at HQ PACAF and threatened to do an IG Complaint at first, but then I thought perhaps I'm going about things the wrong way. Why not try for Germany as a follow-on assignment? After all, there's some unfinished business that needs tending to and this is the perfect opportunity to tie down some loose ends. I bargained it out with my Functional Manager that if I did another year remote at Kunsan, that she would work it to where I could get Ramstein as first pick.

And it happened.

I figured if I was going to give the Devil his due, I might as well do it right and return to this cesspit of humanity. Sure I'm taking one for the team, figuratively speaking, but the long term benefit will definitely outweigh the short term cost. I just needed to make sure I didn't fuck up the same way I did when I was here in 2001 again, and I've gone the extra mile in making sure I haven't either.

Well I've more or less remained invisible for my time here and knew the only way to survive this place was to just shut-up and color since that mentality has grown tenfold from the last time I was here. I don't go out on weekends nor do I try dating any of the women here. I make sure I dress conservatively when out in public, and if I wear anything like a Cradle of Filth t-shirt or Venom t-shirt, I make certain to wear something over it like a jacket or a long-sleeve shirt, so the one or two critical assholes that help run things won't have a fucking coronary. Considering I've seen people get shit for wearing earrings off-base when they were off-duty drives the point home that much more.

I'm out of here come July, but have made it definitive that this time is indeed my last time here in this country. On this base. Around these people. What used to be a party haven for the burnt out and dejected has become monument to bureaucracy at its worst.

Sayonara, assholes!