Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Just plain weird

So when was the first time you saw something just plain weird? It can be anything too - a ghost, ball lightning, or spontaneous combustion. I would classify UFOs into the "weird" category although if you check out Rense.com, people are seeing them pretty much on a daily basis, so they're out of the category - they're just unexplained. But I'm talking about shit that makes sense but just isn't quite right.

I've seen alot of weird shit in the brief life I've lived - a Korean city bus take the sidewalk during a traffic jam, and a fat kid chug a 24 pack of Dr Pepper at a BloodHound Gang concert for $100, but today topped it all:


- I saw a bird puke on the sidewalk and then start eating its own vomit -


No joke! It was a raven or a crow or something. It was a big bird too and just outta the blue it upchucked what appeared to be some chow hall food. It started pecking away at some of the chunky bits and would occasionally walk off into the grass when a pedestrian walked by or if it got bored and started looking for some bugs to eat instead. After about a minute or two it flew off to do whatever the hell it is that birds do - crap on my car.

My co-workers were astonished that I would get a kick outta something so gross and juvenile but considering that all I spoke about yesterday was how to make a shit bomb for these fuck-wits on the autobahn and piss in someone's gas tank for revenge, they were hardly surprised.

Around the end of the day I saw the same bird come back to its pile of puke and continue to chow down, only the puke puddle had dried on the sidewalk but the remnants in the gutter were still good. The bird was going to town on its afternoon meal while dodging traffic that came its way. I saw what I think was a broccoli sprout too that had been sitting out there all day that it finally chomped on before flying off.

I've seen dogs wipe their ass on carpets and even monkeys at the San Diego Zoo take a shit and then start playing with their poo, but for a bird to puke and then go back to eating it, well that's a first and is just plain weird in my book.


And the fucker still ended up shitting on my car!

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