Friday the 13th blows

Hard. Like Zhombie's mom on 2-for-1 night. Fuck me running. I wake up this morning, as most any other morning, getting ready for work and getting ahead of the power curve for once. I have my shit ready as I am going out the door, when I get to my garage and put the key into the ignition of my car. As I go to crank it over, NOTHING HAPPENS. WTF? So I try again. Again, NOTHING. The engine doesn't turn, nor does the power come on the dashboard like it does automatically, yet when I turn on my parking lights and CD player, everything is fine. So what the hell is going on? I start thinking what the hell it could be wrong with my car. Dead battery? Spark plugs need changing? Alternator going bad? Distributor cap fucked? I gotta get to work and this shit SUCKS. BAD. It is then I decide to call ZHOMBIE on my cell phone and ask him for a jump. That way I figure at the very least if my battery did go tits-up overnight, the jump should revitalize everything. After explaining to him what's going on, he makes it over to my place. By then I had managed to push my car out of my garage and into the street a little and for him to hook the jumper cables up. About the third or fourth try everything works although it's not until I take it to the dealership today that I found out what the problem really was. The fucking IGNITION BOX where the key makes contact with the starter fucking wore out of all things. Of all the parts of a car WHEN does that fucking piece of equipment ever fail? Hardly ever!!! Yet on today of all days, my ignition decided to fucking throw a temper tantrum and not cooperate. Needless to say yet again I have to dump more fucking money into my piece of shit CHOKESWAGON now that I have taken it out of storage and have been using it on a regular basis yet again. WTF? I have had to dump more cash into this high-maintenance bitch of a car it's like having a girlfriend practically. Both might look good but they fucking cost an arm and a leg to maintain and of course both depreciate with age. I'm better off riding a fucking 10-SPEED BICYCLE to work and back at this fucking rate, regardless of the weather outside. Anycase, most Friday the 13ths are good because it's payday for us military assholes, however today was the exception to the policy. Perhaps it's because it happened in October and 13 in reverse is 31? Who knows. Heh.